Advice From the Parents of Nine

I come from a long line of big families.  My mom gave birth to seven children.  Her mom, my grandmother, had four children, all girls, and my great-grandmother had nine children, also all girls. 

1981:  Maw-Maw & Paw-Paw Sturm holding my sister and I after we were born.

Some of the wisest parenting advice I've heard comes from my great-grandfather, the only man in that 3 bedroom house in Madisonville, Louisiana.  His advice is similar to what we often read in parenting books, but it's short and simple, coming from a tug boat captain who was born in 1901.

He said always keep your promise to a kid.  If you promise them a piece of candy, give it to them.  If you promise them a spanking, give it to them. 

It sounds simple, but we often fail to follow through with promised consequences.  It's exhausting to be consistent, but children need to know that every time they disobey, they will receive a consequence.  Note to self:  I need to follow through all the time, not just when I feel like it! 

I also hear a trick used in many a grocery store:  Parents fib to their kids and use a scare tactic to get the child to obey.  "Come here right now or I'm going to leave without you!"  When I hear this, I think Really?  You'll leave your kid at Walmart?  What happens when your 4 year old calls your bluff on that one? 

My great-grandmother had some pretty good but simple advice for my mom too, though it has little to do with parenting and everything to do with keeping your sanity.  Her advice was to always take the time for a bath, no matter how crazy your day is.  You'll feel better.   

This same woman said that she never once had a headache from her children.  My mom says the same thing.

I only hope I can be as great a mother as these ladies.